A time when you witnessed an adult (or yourself) reprimand or silence a child after he or she pointed out someone they saw as different (e.g., “That lady talks funny,” “That man only has one leg!” “Why is that man so pretty!”). Include what the child said and what the adult did or said in response. (Note: If you cannot think of a specific time ask a friend or family member.)
About 10 years ago, I witnessed the following in a town center:
A mother and her child were walking in the street. The child was about 4 years old. The child pointed to a woman in a wheelchair and turned to her mom saying: "Why is this woman in a chair?" The mother turned bright red in embarrassment and mumbled to the child: "It is not polite to point." Then, the mother took the child's hand and rushed her off. The child had a rather confused look on her face but went with her mother.
What messages might have been communicated to this child by the adult’s response.
The child was curious about the woman and asked an honest question. However, the mother's response had a negative message for the child. Instead of taking an opportunity to talk with the child about disabilities, the mother felt embarrassed and rushed her off. This can teach children that if you have a disability is something you do not talk about or feel embarrassed about. The child seemed confused by the mother's reaction.
An example of how an anti-bias educator might have responded to support the child’s (or classroom’s) understanding.
An anti-biased educator can support the child's understanding by talking about different disabilities. This can help children understand that there is nothing wrong with disabilities. By talking about the disabilities, an educator can teach about inclusion. I remember the first time I saw "I am Tyler! Don't be surprised." Tyler talks about his own disabilities and how his teachers and friends challenged him and treated him as anyone else. He was able to feel and do things just as a regular teenager without feeling his disabilities are a crutch or something to be ashamed about. This movie was eye opening to me and I think we should teach all our children to include everyone no matter their race, religion, gender or ability.
Anna, This reminded me of the story that was in Pelo's book, Holding Nyla, (pgs. 147-150) where they had a student in a Head Start classroom who was wheelchair bound. They had ordered a doll in a wheelchair that had a problem with the footrest on the wheelchair. The kids had amazing dialogue about it. This is what we need - dialogue - we need to talk to our kids about all types of things, peoples, situations, and hopefully mindsets can change.
ReplyDeleteHi Anna,
ReplyDeleteYou are right, talking about disabilities (and other "differences" that children observe) can really open the door to talking about and practicing inclusion. When we don't talk about these things we are teaching children that these differences are not ok and that they are not things we should question or discuss. And if this is the case then they may begin to form stereotypes because they can never have their questions answered and they are learning that there is something "wrong" with the person or their situation.
I have never seen "I am Tyler! Don't be surprised;" it sounds interesting, I will have to check that out. Thanks for sharing!
Anna,
ReplyDeleteIt is so important for parents to take the time out and explain to children what is going on. I believe if she addressed her properly she may not ask questions like that in public again because she will already have a slight understanding of what a disability is. Pushing aside and or yelling makes the child seem like it is bad to be in wheelchair or the question she asked was wrong.
The mother shouldn't have felt ashamed about the situation. All she had to do was tell her child that she discuss it with her later. I mean the mother could have waited till they got in the car or at home and explained the different types of abilities that people have and why.
ReplyDelete